I wish I could punch you in the face.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Randomize
