You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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