A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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