I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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