I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
