I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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