First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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