u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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