Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
