new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize