I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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