haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
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i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
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If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.