Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
