your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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