dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Your dad touched me again.
My Higher Power is John Stamos
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
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