they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
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