K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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