wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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