Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
