she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
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if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
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Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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