My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
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There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
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I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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