I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
