Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
