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Cold hands, warm shart.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
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