Texts From Last Night

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  (515): View more from Iowa

  After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding

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  (515): After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding http://tfl.nu/mxxu
  Replies (19) Good night (3306) Bad night (797)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.

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  (330): Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT. http://tfl.nu/98ye
  Replies (27) Good night (1402) Bad night (6302)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.

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  (210): I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper. http://tfl.nu/rcv4
  Replies (76) Good night (4887) Bad night (2096)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  bc i get to see you. naked.

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  (203): are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid? (203): bc i get to see you. naked. http://tfl.nu/db7h
  Replies (24) Good night (8467) Bad night (1544)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful

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  (410): We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful http://tfl.nu/jdk0
  Replies (19) Good night (4007) Bad night (1435)
• Favorite

  (361): View more from Texas

  I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.

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  (361): I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off. http://tfl.nu/sc97
  Replies (21) Good night (4442) Bad night (1641)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.

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  (336): Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings. http://tfl.nu/e4bs
  Replies (6) Good night (1093) Bad night (804)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class

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  (814): I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class http://tfl.nu/2lhx
  Replies (7) Good night (1154) Bad night (484)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.

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  (419): I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina. http://tfl.nu/vhcx
  Replies (6) Good night (1238) Bad night (452)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"

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  (403): I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath" http://tfl.nu/0s5r
  Replies (3) Good night (825) Bad night (395)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome

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  (207): But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome http://tfl.nu/qpzb
  Replies (8) Good night (760) Bad night (442)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.

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  (540): Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar. http://tfl.nu/gi8s
  Replies (1) Good night (469) Bad night (311)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.

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  (714): I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too. http://tfl.nu/il0e
  Replies (2) Good night (718) Bad night (376)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?

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  (720): Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet? http://tfl.nu/zkp2
  Replies (6) Good night (435) Bad night (284)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now

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  (318): Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now http://tfl.nu/icx7
  Replies (2) Good night (351) Bad night (142)

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