Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize