She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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