do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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