I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Randomize
