Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
