I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
kristin has been a bad kristin
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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