Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
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