It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
