You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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