yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
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