I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Randomize
