Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Do vagina's smell?
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
