I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
