He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
