I smell stomach acid.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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