Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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