she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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