This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
