he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
