my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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