they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
