I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
