Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
