jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
