Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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