Texts From Last Night

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  (561): View more from Florida

  You drink too much

  (1-561): View more from Florida

  No, I drink just the right amount - too often.

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  (561): You drink too much (1-561): No, I drink just the right amount - too often. http://tfl.nu/1oor
  Replies (2) Good night (2846) Bad night (539)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?

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  (603): You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular? http://tfl.nu/marg
  Replies (7) Good night (2281) Bad night (555)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.

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  (540): I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal. http://tfl.nu/t01g
  Replies (22) Good night (1358) Bad night (3327)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.

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  (740): ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days. http://tfl.nu/z4ue
  Replies (56) Good night (5618) Bad night (1020)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.

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  (586): we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path. http://tfl.nu/fhzw
  Replies (17) Good night (1013) Bad night (5148)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.

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  (443): I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from. http://tfl.nu/qa0c
  Replies (11) Good night (5442) Bad night (1045)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?

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  (909): If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night? http://tfl.nu/ont9
  Replies (14) Good night (978) Bad night (4175)
• Favorite

  (807): View more from Ontario

  If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right

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  (807): If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right http://tfl.nu/lb7z
  Replies (3) Good night (3912) Bad night (847)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.

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  (202): You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first. http://tfl.nu/24o7
  Replies (3) Good night (674) Bad night (1548)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.

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  (256): Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important. http://tfl.nu/3x1r
  Replies (4) Good night (1728) Bad night (539)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.

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  (316): If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong. http://tfl.nu/36w1
  Replies (3) Good night (870) Bad night (1571)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me

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  (530): Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me http://tfl.nu/x3r5
  Replies (0) Good night (1062) Bad night (264)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat

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  (440): I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat http://tfl.nu/9vl7
  Replies (3) Good night (595) Bad night (535)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink

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  (402): I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink http://tfl.nu/3wto
  Replies (8) Good night (851) Bad night (279)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear

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  (512): my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear http://tfl.nu/fox2
  Replies (2) Good night (806) Bad night (317)

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